I thought it was only one of those days....

It turned into 6 (and possibly more, it's only Friday).

In my last post I told you about Sunday.

Monday, pretty uneventful. I'm pretty sad about Nana. I cried a lot. Found out about the arrangements. I honestly don't remember much more.

Tuesday. I'm developing a cough. I need something to wear. I have 2 somber events to attend and all my good clothes shrunk in the dryer (that's my story and I'm sticking to it). So about 1 I call my mom. She's headed to Kohls when she gets dressed. So I ask if I can tag along. It was a couple hours later when my jeans were dry that I left. So I turn out of our neighborhood on to the main road when the break light comes on. And the message says Low Break Fluid. This is all I need. I needed to use some coupons for a sale item at Winn-Dixie anyway, so I'll get some there. Well it turns out that in a minivan, the engine being wedged in the front completely different from any other sort of vehicle, the break fluid thingy is located under the windshield. Yes, under. So I lean across the engine and try my hardest to look at the fluid level...can't tell. SO I stick my finger in. Seems like there's fluid in there to me. I doubt it's just the light, but I haven't had a problem stopping and there are no kids with me, so I press on. We can take mom's car shopping. It's way cooler anyway. Off to Kohls. I like Kohls. I was not successful there tonight. We left empty handed and headed to Target where the closest thing they have to dressy is a strapless number (that shouldn't come in that size...). And they don't have ties. Like neck ties. Hubby needs a nice, non-novelty tie. They have none. Weird, but no big deal, I have a gift card at Casual Male. Who close freakishly early. No luck there either. Head to Cato. I find a shirt. One stinking shirt that costs more than I am normally inclined to pay on a whole outfit! But it's a nice shirt and I have a skirt already to pair it with. So we head to the mall, park at Sears and I found the perfect tie. Then to Lane Bryant. I told you all my clothes shrunk. After several outfits I finally decide on one. And I have a coupon ($25 off a $75 purchase...Party!). So the dress is only $40. Oh darn, I need to spend more to get free stuff. Then the sales girl says some magic words. I can save you 40% if you apply for a credit card, if you're approved or not. And I can still use my coupon. So I spent just under $60 and got:
1 2-piece dress (it has a short jacket)
2 bras
6 panties
I was very happy with my deal. I actually saved $143 after all was said and done...

So we didn't get home until really late, skipped a full meal for a pulled pork sammy on a hamburger bun. And went to bed.

Wednesday was the viewing. I don't really like viewings. I've only been to one and frankly it creeped me out especially since it was a person I really love. I am not looking forward. I really love my Nana too. But I needed to go. My mother needs me. She is holding up pretty well so far, but I don't think it will last. So my intent for the day was to meet with the Avon lady (I'm officially an Avon representative now) , go to Walmart for a short list of stuff, and head home to change. I didn't know that the Avon thing would take so darn long. We had to leave the house by 4 and at 3:20 I was still chatting with the Avon lady and I'm 15 minutes from home. I politely excused myself and sped home. Thankfully, I had fixed my hair and put on a fact to meet the Avon lady so all I had to do was change. So by 4 we're on our way. Mom had spent the night so we took her car again. I'm coughing a bit more, so I throw a handful of cough drops in my purse.

Let me tell you. This was a pretty heart wrenching experience. It was hard seeing the woman who I remember as so full of life and wit lying there in that coffin....of course, my mom and aunt made sure she'd travel to the afterlife in style. A pink casket. With roses. It really was beautiful. Nana loved roses, but fate made her allergic. Now she can have roses without a full on allergy attack. Mom sat in the first pew, along with my aunt, 2 of her grown (or almost grown) children, and some woman I don't know. I don't know this woman, because she is not a family member. And she's taking up my freaking seat. This is a viewing though. I will not make a scene. The priest recites the rosary and some poignant readings and my mother sobs. And I am across the room. No one is there to comfort her. When the good father is done, I walk across, kneel in front of my mother and lay my head on her heart. It's the best I could do. People are tripping on my feet, but I don't care. We composed ourselves and stayed a few minutes more to say goodbye until tomorrow and headed for the car, she promptly handed me the keys and we left. Then both of us realize we have eaten nothing for hours. And of course, once you realize you're hungry, you are. So we stopped for pizza. It used to be I Love NY Pizza. Same owners, different name, great pizza. It was fitting. Nana was of German and Irish decent. She married a full-blooded Italian. Guess she liked pizza too :)

Thursday was the actual funeral. I awoke at 1:40 something because I could not breathe. Like there was something swollen over my esophagus. I struggle, tossing and turning for a couple of hours. Go to the recliner, back to bed, prop myself up with bunches of pillows. Nothing helped. Finally at about 4 I woke up my husband, sobbing. I can't breathe. I was panicking. He immediately starts pulling on some sweats and I go out to the living room where my mom was sleeping on the couch and woke her up. She was so groggy and I felt really bad waking her up, but when I'm sick, I want my mommy. Micah insisted on taking me to the ER. Thankfully, there is a little community hospital not too far from our house and they have a full service ER. So we went there, I was the only patient. They did chest x-rays, listened to my lungs and everything sounds/looks good. The doc, or rather PA diagnoses it as an upper respiratory infection. Just great. Because I need more drama. Good news, it will run it's course in a couple of days. Bad news, the cough may stick around a while. But we're out and home by 6:45. H is skipping school today and attending the service, E is going to a sitter. Hubby is a pallbearer.
This time, I make positive I am sitting next to my mom. Of course, there is a little 5 year old between us. H wanted to go. She has been asking about Heaven and what happens to people when they die and I just really had a feeling she needed to go. It was heart wrenching. But I manage to make it through, thanks in part to some Afrin. H didn't really understand. But she dug the part where you repeat after the preist. And she got to ride in the limo on the way back from the graveside part. Yet another car problem, this time with the little car that hubby uses. The power locks are broken. And of course not under waranty. We all met at my aunt's after and shared some food and family time. On the way home (I live literally 2 minutes from my aunt) H starts to cry. I ask her why. She misses great-nana. I think it finally dawned on her. So we talked about it and I layed in bed with her for a while before she went to sleep. It was a sad day to put it mildly.

I tried sleeping on the recliner last night. Did good for a couple of hours, then thought I wanted to go to bed. It just didn't work. So back to the living room and on the reclining end of the sofa. I slept fitfilly until I heard the alarm go off in my room so I went and got H up for school. She was just fine this morning and wanted toast and pnut butter and jelly for breakfast. So I spread the pnum butter and spooned out the jelly. When I was done, I licked the jelly spoon. And felt the tingle on my upper lip. Great. Now a freaking cold sore. This is turning into the week from Hell. But as the saying goes, The Lord only gives you what he knows you can handle. Or something like that. At least today is Halloween and the kids are excited about trick or treating at their grandmas. Dispite everything, today will be a good day. So there!

Rest in Peace Nana. I love you forever and you will always live in my memories and stories to my children.